How was your Memorial Day?
Don't remember... but I do have an American flag painted on my boob signed by a Staff Sargent... Oh God, I hope that's his military rank and not a nick name.
she told me that she was curious about how cum tasted. of course i left you.
i only understood the part that said mucho orgasmos
At least our walk of shames never included a bag of chips and a jar of queso..
Aww you are cute. With your penis. And failures.
You were riding my three year old's train yelling, 'I think I can, I think I can!!'
I thought I could.
Hey dude. I've got a mini fridge in my closet now so we don't have to worry about getting drunk and falling down the stairs on our way to get more beer.
I think you should just bang him and get it out of your system.
That's what you say about everyone.
I give up. I can't handle that class sober any longer. I have an army of whiskey shooters for the next three weeks. Wish me luck.
Dude, who WASN'T thinking of motorboating her?
It was great. Somehow, sleeping with her sister cured everything!
why does every cop we meet know your name?
You poured all their beer into ziploc baggies so it would be "better on the go"
i found a picture from last night of you sat on the floor naked, covered in butter and crying. care to explain?
I was hoping you could tell me..
It's like the perfect sandwich, once you find it you want to ensure your future access to it.
Randomize
