I feel like abortions should bother me more
She knew it was going down when I had her search for "condoms" in my iPhone Maps.
And we will make penis cookies and eat them suggestively
if three guys were standing in front of you and they differed only in the hairiness of the groin who would you choose: smooth as a baby's bottom, the grass lands or the amazon jungle?
i think you're getting too neurotic about why she won't touch you.
New beer pong partner names "Bus Boys" ... We clear tables
he used his one phone call on me and it said "you have a collect call from- LETS GET IT- at the montgomery county jail".
Her parents walked in on us. So for my birthday they bought me a blow-up doll with their daughters face on it. I don't know what to think right now.
I've spent more money on drugs for bonnaroo than my actual ticket. Proudly.
he handed me my panties in front of my date. turns out he wasn't that mad.
like he couldn't stop by and throw me in the back seat and ask for a blowjob? he had to give me flowers?
Sometimes I think about the fact that I lost my virginity while watching anime and I wonder what that says about me
I think it was a low point but honestly at this point I've had so many that my life is like a valley
The minute he showed me his Mumford and sons tattoo is the minute i could literally feel my pussy dry up
I'm sorry I tried to spit drugs down your throat like a baby bird last night.
Coffee and girl scout cookies. Breakfast of champions.
Get fucked.
Randomize
