you ran into the room and announced "I JUST FUCKED HER IN THE ASS". apparently you forgot she left the bedroom 5 minutes before you and was standing with us all.
whats a positive sounding word for "exploit"?
I think you're asking the wrong person. You don't understand. Like I would fuck the act of fucking itself if I could.
then my gynecologist said "its like opening up buried treasure"
These 23 People Had Coworkers From Hell
they wouldn't let me take the pitcher of beer on the ferris wheel
5 am booty call.. And I went I need to gain better control of my vagina
tell me why they applauded then the bartender locked himself in the bathroom when i walked into the bar today ????
I'm sending you the three minute video I jus took,....it's of me eating a pear up close
My tuesday consisted of speaking to a federal agent for two hours and watching a roving band of gypsies jump over a fire until 2:30am
21 NSFW Facts About Famous Celebrities That Will Blow Your Mind
The guy I brought home last night made a speedy escape while I was in the bathroom. The only trace I found of his flight was a lone sock on the stairs.... It was like a whorey low budget Cinderella
He has an accent, blue cross AND gainful employment. Just saying, he's going to urgent care once I'm done with him
Dude, I totally just made my launch phrase on my new phone "Wingardium Leviosa" so that when people try it and it doesn't work I can say, "It's leveeOHsa, not leveeoh-SA."
Listen, I booty called my boss last night from the company phone. I may need to brush up my resume.
I could tell my life story through kermit memes
I might be drinking a 4-day old opened beer on a Wednesday. You're in no position to judge me.
It would have only made it one day at my place.