smoked weed with Joakim Noah last night....if he was half as fast to the basket as he is to grab a joint from me we'd have another championship on our hands
on my arm i have a score card from when we apparently had a competition to see who could harden his nipples fastest..
who won?
THAT is your concern right now?
I just withdrew $200 in ones. I think the teller knew what was up
Woke up with pink eye in both my eyes. That's how the threesome went
I'm blazed about to take my 8am final. Another girl is too. We just looked each other in the eyes. She's my soul sister.
I'm making myself a nametag with my contact info and pinning it to myself like a kindergardenter in case I get lost when I black out on Sat.
Can we laminate it? Just to be safe.
ive penciled you in for a day of excessive drinking
can anyone on this campus do anything sober?
The amount of drugs I did this weekend make me concerned about my health but at the same time fascinated to see if I could do more
Like I'm literally drinking whiskey and making a stocking for my cat right now. What. Goes. On.
Maybe if I get to know him I'll stop wanting to fuck his wife so much.
Dude, he wouldn't have sex with me during halftime cause we were rooting for different teams and that would be "bad juju", I had to settle for 69.
I haven't gotten dressed in 4 days. God bless you, unemployment.
Did you wake up next to Karina?
So that's her name
this bedazzled flask is my best investment yet
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