No awkward lesbian experiences without me
Her best guy friend really had a thing for her all along.... Now we're back together and he's gone Dawson's Creek with his away messages.
i never realize how drunk i am until i start using people as human stripper poles
i ran around the party telling everyone that my favorite sexual position was also the only position that made me queef...i kept calling it the "double edged sword"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
this morning your mother said to me "sorry to have to meet you like this, in my sons bed" later she said "you never know whos gonna be in there. its scary sometimes"
Some chick just tried to plug her vodka into the wall.
I just remembered that he had fake blood all over his face last night. I woke up with it all over my dick. He was 50. Please don't judge me.
Just bartered a McD's cheeseburger and fries for two pitchers. Oregon Trail ain't got shit on me.
Honestly I'm not even that excited to see my boyfriend. I'm more excited to see his penis. His penis inside of me.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I fucked my ex boyfriend to get shrooms for you guys
That's the sweetest thing I've ever heard
Sext: Bring me pancakes from the midnight breakfast gathering please
My drug dealer bought me a book for Christmas. What a gentleman.
Let's not forget that we had sex on the ground in public tonight.
It's dangerous to be this horny at work. I'm gonna stain my desk chair
Hammered...8am...why is there chickens in the living room?
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