If its called oral, why is it so hard to talk?
My doc was like ur only supposed to have 6 sexual partners..thats just one semester at college
Performed a legit marriage between 2 drunk people at last call yesterday. Becoming ordained has already paid for itself.
You realize it's finals week?
Ya that's the school's fault. St. Patrick's day came first.
I wish I could just thrust my cock straight into her new relationship.
Yea you just drank all the Hookah water, then started talking gibberish about the Kool Aid you just drank.
who was wearing the fake mustache? I just found one in my cleavage
my head hurts. i need an adult
and not like a cool parent adult. like a full fledged party pooper grandparent adult
I would compare it to a jeffrey but in smoothie form. More drugs in here than Bobby Brown's sock drawer.
The only thing that was weird was that it WASN'T weird when she got out of the shower and saw me blowing him.
I woke up in a tow truck cuddling plan b. Can you pick me up?
I felt like a personal hot pocket and all I could taste was cigarettes.
Is it considered a bad morning to find your boss half naked in the parking lot of work at 7am?
That depends, how hot is your boss?
We don't have the same problems as normal people do we?
also, my mom just called to make sure the dick tattoo on your arm was fake..
Randomize
