I wish they had a smiley of two girls making out
Um don't talk to me about fat. I just used my chip bag to cover up all my candy wrappers in the garbage.
I would invite you but we are high and there is an AK-47. Not your scene.
He was spoon feeding me wine all night.
while we were dancing I voluntarily took my bra off and hung it around his neck as a necklace. 2011 lets go
I really hope the fuck ferry pays me a visit to close out 2011 properly.
Guess who is playing his new drum set when his roommate gets home to teach her a lesson about binge drinking to the point of being taken to the emergency room?
The cop told us he we helped him pass his monthly bong quota. He almost ran out of room on the hood of his car..
Just finished off half a bottle of vodka. Can't take in anymore liquids so I ate 3 spoonfuls of your powdered gatorade to fight off the hangover. Wish me luck and check me for a pulse when you get in!
Still stoned. I like your bong. It can stay. No others, though.
COME HERE AND I WILL SUCK YOUR COCK UNDER THE LIGHT OF THIS BEAUTIFUL ELECTRICITY
The fabulous human disaster: it is him
These morning walks of shame have became my morning jogs
She was calling him Bob Saget and asking him to buy her shots....how do you think the night went?
I think I fell in love last night
That guy had a face tattoo and was named Cheddar. Please tell me you’re kidding.
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