it's just weird having a massive boner in the morning when you could have used it the night before.
i dont care if i had to wear a dress to fuck her, she was super hot and i stand by my decision
I wish that one Sunday morning I could wake up feeling like I have my life together.
She poured a bottle of rum in the champagne fountain, did like 5 jello shots at the same time, then lit herself on fire. Twice. This is how everyone should turn 21.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Hurricane Sex Time is the only thing iv said since it started.
Every grown women needs to pee herself once in her life. It builds character.
I just ran into mom and dad day drinking at the bar while I skipped class and was day drinking at the same bar.
You christened everyone with a powdered doughnut and then tried to absorb vodka with your nipple.
Told her my spirit animal was the spread eagle. Now that's my name in her phone.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I think I've forgotten how to blink. Help plz?
Fuck you and your fucking taquito's.
One day I'll learn not to get drunk on a plane. Today is not that day.
You can't die you're my only democrat family member
I just swiped right for a guy on Tinder solely because it looked like he was holding Zoboomafoo
I woke up with my my shoes on and pants half way off and missing 60 dollars. Please please please tell me you saw me last night.
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