guys are not supposed to queef...right?
i didnt like the question options for my yahoo account..so i made up the question and it was "favorite bathroom to shit in"
i made the cop pinkie-promise not to arrest me if i failed the breathalizer.
it's kind of nice to have a picture of me making out with someone and actually know who it is for once
I had sex on an exercise ball. The inevitable has occurred.
I'm sorry I dragged a dildo (on a leash) into your room last night.
Dont forget about the tuna sandwich behind your TV
it only took 2 hours but we managed to melt the purity ring down with a butane torch
the cops were hovering over him then shinned a flashlight to the floor above ours, then I realized that some fucker jumped from the third story.
fuck our hall.
She face-timed me on the toilet. My dick is never going to recover from that.
Who the fuck superglued glowsticks to my arm.
I got titty fucked last night and you're breastfeeding your newborn. Clearly we have gone two totally different paths since 2011.
I had no plans to sleep with him, but he had to stay because of the snow. I always say, don't look a gift storm in the mouth.
Anytime you wish.we are doing double shots in the kitchen,and I drank a beer in the shower,so...the sooner you get here,the sooner you can get on our level.
i just found a pair of your underwear stuffed behind my harry potter books...was that on purpose?
haha no, it was majik
Randomize