you want to go make fun of the strippers on try out night
i got kicked out last time for laughing
IM SAVING ALL MY LOVE FOR YOU
I don't want it.
he broke up with me while standing outside, half naked, waiting to fuck him. i feel like a leper right about now.
It's called 'beer pong' not 'everclear and coke pong' for a reason...
he kept saying "mind over matter" as he fucked me
I can always tell its time to do laundry when my vibrator doesn't stay covered up in my sock drawer.
Ok, Jen and I are going out tonight and getting rowdy. I think you and Steph need to come. I understand if you can't, but not going out means you're automatically obligated to post bail. If necessary.
Just sharpening my eyeliner with a butterfly knife. You know. Typical weekday morning.
You chest bumped everyone we walked by on the way home... Even girls
Fell asleep in the library, woke up because I almost let out a sleep fart. That was close.
True freedom is running around a sex club in former power plant in Berlin wearing a boots, a jock
btw im having a "its finally warm enough for a bbq in Toronto" party tonight. bring all the alcohol you have. and hamburger buns.
nothing like having plan b for breakfast in a cvs parking lot before ordering this semester's textbooks
I'm in the ER bruh, I went skinny dipping last night and a cat fish bit my dick.
Ladies night is a gift from god. If it weren't for that, I'd probably be selling my eggs for booze money.
Randomize