Christians are straight up FREAKS
i have a strong urge to join the asians in the park doing tai chi. I think im still high .
wooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooo
ooooooooooooo i'm drink
Bad news: I had to be at work at 7:15. Good news: no one had used the bathroom yet so I got to defile a freshly cleaned stall
When do i get to see u next week?
When I teabag your entire family
My superpower would be to be able to make a chick instantly start her period just by thinking about it
well,he told me "i bet you five bucks that i can right cum on the mirror with my cum" i said alright do it, lets just say he's five bucks richer...
How much cunt could a cunt bag punch if a cunt bag could punch cunt?
He's prob getting laid right now and I'm sitting alone in my duct tape shoes.
im not picky. i just want someone whod go down on me while im writing my psych midterm paper. thats not a lot to ask.
Oh just living the dream. And by living the dream I mean drinking franzia out of a martini glass and watching family matters. Also, drinking every time Carl Winslow has a mustache and Eddie wears MC Hammer pants
I totally just somersaulted to the bathroom to avoid moving out of my fetal position
I don't know if I should be concerned or impressed.
The dog just sneezed and it sounded like a person, after I said bless you I freaked the fuck out and got the gun
WHY DID I MAKE A 7 minute video of me eating crackers and cheese when I was high
Send it to me
Dude. I’m playing chess through iMessage with a stripper. What has my life become.
Randomize
