The best feeling....farting and having the bubble hit your balls
She just sent me a picture of a heart. I need to stop fucking freshman...
He looked way older than 15. He probably thought that since I have braces I was 15. Fuck. The 6 year age gap is never to be spoken about. Especially because what happened constitutes as illegal.
Who was that couple sleeping in your bed with us last night?
Im drinking in homer but I guess Egan got arrestest on an "assault by water ballon" charge but tom actually threw the water balloon in question at the bartender.
Long story short, the rash from your last birthday party told me not to go to this one.
'Twas I. Do you have any idea what it's like waking up to see you sent a text inviting someone to partake in "sexy rumpus?"
Hey. There is naked girl with "plz don't touch her. She just turned 21" sharpied on her chest. What happened last night?
Your first mistake was not throwing your beer at the RA and running
For a pair of gay men you destroy a lot of vagina.
No more going to class sober.. Tried it for a day or two, its just not for me
So you'd go straight for a fat chick with cheese on her tits?
Yes.
We just saw two bitche in pink capris jazzercising down the road. On Thanksgiving.
He literally ejaculated and I hit Uber
Forget about letting a 70-year-old man suck on my tits for coke... telling my new boyfriend about it was the poor life choice.
Randomize
