sitting in class between the roommates of the two girls i fucked over break. this feels like a bad version of wife swap
One night stand. Woke up at her dad's house. She already left for work. Shit's about to go down.
I feel eeeverything like there's a rhythm and everything can be felt w/o ever touching it. And it's beautiful. Sunshine or raindrops it's like orgasming. Everything has a taste.
We need to pull ourselves out of this slump. We need dick and lots of it. We are going to fuck our way to happiness.
It was horrifying, i havent seen a girls mouth open that wide since that one episode of Goosebumps..
dude he passed out in the strip club on his birthday, WHILE he was getting a lap dance. That drunk.
Also, I've finally come to the point in the relationship when having sex with socks on is ok.
This girl invited us back on the promise of weed and strudel...she delivered neither.
My goal in life is to ruin sex for someone. To be so mindblowingly unreal that they can never find anyone like me ever again. So far it's going well.
A party without a piñata is not a party I want to attend.
Think I have the only job where I can be naked in a room with my manager at work. Apart from hookers
Me too...I'm driving to work trying to figure out if I put my pants on the right way.
Ps. I'm slapping the bag. It's an emergency.
You know you were really drunk last night when you woke up and had someone else's jacket with their car keys and medical marijuana that you wore home from the bar and no sign of your actual jacket.
Im drunk taking pregnancy tests with this really hot girl...i dont know what is happening
Randomize
