I just found a frying pan...in my bed.
is it wrong that I prefer my women with low self esteem and a smidgen of an eating disorder?
Car fucking is for special occasions like birthdays and bank holidays. Don't want to lose the magic by making it an everyday thing.
Do you know how easy it would be to shoplift if I was a magician?!
so we'll all just be running around naked, basically. and high.
just snorted lines off a mancala board. I'm destined to win this game.
He is dust bro dust in the wind I waited in this unlocked car long enough.
I've decided he is effectively a mouth, hands and cock held together by bad ideas and compliments, and I'm OK with that.
wanna come over? I have movies.
sure, what movies
porn or disney, your choice
it was like teleporting. everytime i opened my eyes, i was somewhere different... usually the floor.
I went with plan f. get drunk and start a fire in my yard
Kinda awkward to hear your aunt complain about loose women when you're in town to be a stunt dick for a swingers convention. Just sayin.
He told me I was "too flexible." Excuse me?
Sitting across the table from one of my high school teachers who hasn't seen me since I was about 16 drinking a beer wearing a leotard
It goes to show, Sane person, daddy doms, little girls, all of us may seem different but deep inside we all grow wisdom teeth
Randomize
