I wish I could drop acid with the muppets
Don't leave without me in the morning. I keep scaring everyone cause I'm sleeping in the bathtub.
So I think I just got a job offer from the guy I used to blow. See, networking pays off.
Here's the thing. I'm really high and have lots of questions about lightning.
Blood. All over. Pre coke adventure needs to slow down unless I'm involved
And in my birthday dress, with my friends, i peed on myself in line for the club. Still went in and partied. I remember pieces
Being drunk is way better. Seriously, I just licked your brother to make sure my spit was actually real.
I have to sanitize my nipples and its just to cold in here for it to be ok
I was grossed out that all their candles smelled like vagina and then I remembered where my fingers had been.
literally 50% of my time being 20 has involved my genitals thus far
grandma made pot brownies .. oh god bless us everyone
Please hurry. I'm the only one here who's not an attorney with a trophy wife.
I buy a new bowl every time I get a new guy. It's retail therapy.
Goal: finish my bio assignment before the Xanax kicks in.
theres a girl in the library eating whip cream out of a starbucks cup... only whip cream, im way to high for this shit
Randomize
