More tranny stories later!
she woke up with a sticky ear
I saw a penis in my cereal this morning. do you think my cheerios are like professor trelawney's tea leaves?
one can only hope.
You were mounting an escalator last night, shouting "I have no health insurance" at people
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Not only was there cake on the wall but someone shoved cake and meat in a cup and put it in the fridge.
Im drunk with people I love less than you. fix it.
Theres a midget tsa agent. Just an observation
Would you wanna look up as you cum and for a split-second see your dad?
Really? And is this the kinda party we talked about earlier?
Yup. It's just me crying in a closet eating soup
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
This is why Helen Keller didn't drink
My dad wants to dress like mitt Romney tomorrow night and tell trick or treaters they owe him candy.
The fact that you walked around talking like Barbie and still got laid amazes me.
On the flip side, we did almost have sex wearing a gorilla mask and deer antlers.............
I woke up to the smell of shame and vomit in my hair... went to the bathroom to shower and passed out... woke back up naked with the blow dryer on... thanks for making my birthday a success
You offered him a “Sorry I Blew Your Brother” Blowjob. How does that make it right?
I promised him it would be better than the one I gave his brother which is really nice of me since their actually only half brothers and his brother is cuter
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