there are definitely too many half naked pictures of me out there for me to ever be famous.
Is it weird that we showed each other our pussy's and pointed out the good and bad things about each others??
Literally just as i started to cum the church bells next ot my house began to ring. either it was the most epic timing ever or god was watching and congratulating me
taking shots each time the weatherman says Dont go out in this blizzard
There's a level of bonding between people at the liquor store at 10:30 in the morning that's unrivaled
Congrats to the girl that left her positive preggo test in the bathroom...
Johns diaper came in the mail. He's freaking out thinking there's some conspiracy going on since he sharted on the drive home from st. Louis
I mean, I can get to know him eventually. The time frame doesn't really matter. I'll have sex with him regardless of whether he's interesting or not.
It's all fun and games until you throw up hot cheetos in your drawer.
I just learned my tits were fire resistant. I should join the freakin circus
Plus, it's just valuable. Virgin pee is very well-priced.
Clearly it doesn't get better with age. Just more sexual
No he's here. We were watching Harry Potter stoned as shit and he fell asleep with his head in my lap. I'll figure out what to do with him after Harry gives Dobby the sock.
I don't want to get pregnant doggy style. That's sad.
I gave her a cheerful high five and she turned to me and said, "we should do that with our genitals." I may have to marry this girl.
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