you know you've been in a long relationship when u start retiring sex toys
I'm passing your future prison.
Our relationship just reached the stage where i can touch her boobs while making a honking noise without getting hit in the face
I feel I need to conquer him. He's six ft eight and 265lbs. Its like the mount Everest of sex.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
as I was walking out the door her and her roommate started singing "toot it and boot it".. I'm in love
Leave it to us to have a family reunion in a bar bathroom
Oh god. Standing was a rash decision
I made it to Starbucks to do work and I've just been sitting here with my head on the table for 30 minutes...
I love her to death but its like you have to do 5 lines of coke to be on her level.
WHY IN THE FUCK DID YOU LET ME DRUNK PUNCH STEVE? HE IS SUCH A NICE GUY!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Nothing says casual like stairwell bjs
im dying and naked and this is what youre living with next year.
Nothing like a little chlamydia diagnosis to ring in the new year
I threw your vagina at him like a grenade. And sweet Jesus he caught it like a champ
Omg. I definitely just got hit on by my doctor AFTER he completed my pap smear which clearly showed I was in the middle of an outbreak. What. The. Fuck.
I hope that will b the last time i take off my pants in the chemistry building.
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