giving a blow job on a jetski isn't as easy as it sounds.
Just saw a white stretch Hummer limo outside of CiCi's pizza. Way to live up to the stereotypes, Alabama.
i should probably find things i have in common with someone besides drinking, before having sex with them
Just watched a drug bust from the Ralphs parking lot while listening to Frank Sinatra. Happy Valentine's Day.
Not till Sunday. I'm going to sleep in my car. And I know. This place is insane. Blood on the stAirs 5 dollar slices of pizza. A girl on our floor had a stroke.
apparently "preggers as fuck" isn't an appropriate way to describe someone...
todays sighting is titled: Bum taking pictures with an invisible camera.
He showed up at my door at 3 AM wearing a Santa hat with a tiara attached.
Do not tell me I cant do drunk math ever again, AND I made a creative way of telling him I want him to fuck me.
The frequency with which I change my vibrator batteries is getting a little ridiculous....
just played fuck the dealer and thunderstruck with my physics ta. he is the third ta that i have drank with this semester, i think i'm getting good at college
How much have you had to drink?
Qhaghao Oslo?
That seems like quite a lot.
just learned i can hear my fish chewing his food WHILE HES IN HIS BOWL. im going to have to call you back.
On the good side I got hit on by a cute college guy. But the bad side was having sex in a frat house for first time in 9 years
i really didnt think i was that drunk last night but the txts from unknwn #s that say i like your lace panties are def telling me otherwise
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