Come on the kid is gayer than me
Like the straightest thing he could do right now is take it up the butt
even through the webcam i could tell he was aiming for my face/hair
His hands were made for my vagina.
That was the gentlest I've ever been bitten in the face by a dog
we used the bottom of a tampon for coke since no one had a 20 on them. My life has resisted to this.
I may or may not juuuust be reaching the point where I find some humor from waking up in the parking lot at the standard.
I put the extra pregnancy test in my sex toys box as a reminder that my actions have consequences.
Chick in class has 69 tattooed on the back of her neck. Target acquired.
Hey so I just want to get straight to the point it was me who ate the last cupcake and it was your sister who I fucked last nigt
My entire summer has consisted of being too drunk for this shit, too sober for this shit, or too hungover for this shit.
Well since your going through her phone..look man she loves you..she just loves my dick more
you know, i'm always afraid you're going to think i only want you for sex because i only text you when i'm horny
speaking of, guess what i'm thinking about
The only downside to doctor sex is that getting choked with a stethoscope leaves marks.
There's no button for "gave my boyfriend's cock to a friend" on my intimacy calendar.
I’m literally naked drinking a beer and I gotta leave in 6 minutes for work lol
Randomize
