They totally botched my boob job. My tits look like they're are winking.
its like an ocean threw up right in your lap
I hope you shit your pants in a socially devastating situation.
I'm sick of being broke. I had vicodin and frosting for lunch.
ill be fine wheb you get back. I'm gunna do real world things like washing the dishes. having to perform serious tasks brings you down.
Realistically anyone can come I don't care it's Boston what do I own boston? No. I just don't want people who are gonna give me "why are you doing that" kinda look when I take birthday shots out of my birthday babe shot glass necklace.
You know it's bad when I can already feel tomorrow's hangover before even drinking today.
i feel we're the only people who'd use nyquil sexually
So question, would you consider it morally wrong to grind up Cialas and put it in ones cocktail? Then I get what I want and he doesn't have to be embarrassed and he can win the mental game with himself? I'm only thinking of him...
Can we just cry and dive into a couch-sized bag of sadness-chips, dip them in a la-z-boy sized jar of depression salsa while watching a show called 'Forget Your Hopes and Dreams, Just Kill Yourself'?
Come here I'm naked
And I want mozzarella sticks
Spending Thanksgiving making a swinging profile brings the day to a whole new level...
do you think eating a burger while having sex counts as multitasking skills?
he’s basically the devil with a fuck boy hair cut and chlamydia
their motto was "the first one to get arrested wins" so of course today was interesting
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