I wanna put my baby in that!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Ew you even made it your fb status
Ppl probably think ur having a kid
Love having children with random chicks
ur dog is so gonna tell on us one day.
for doing what?
for smoking bowls out on the deck while your parents aren't home.
i passed out on the floor in my hallway and woke up with my dog licking himself 2 inches from my face. my first reaction? envy
after we finished we were both getting water at the kitchen sink...butt naked
then my sister's foreign roommate walked out...in footy pajamas
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I felt like I was in a real life creepy Myspace message. "girl u cute" ... "girl u got a really nice smile"
Just checked an empty cooler on the flight to Notre Dame. You don't have to tell me you're jealous, I already know.
Frozen waffles and wine. Loneliness-party of one
Was that not clear on Friday when I nearly deapthroated two ice cubes?
It's the building I live in, they were lucky I was wearing clothes at all
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Can we just talk about how I wrote out all the stuff I had to do this week and for Thursday it says "drink and cry"? ...I don't remember putting that but it sounds like something I would do
I bought left over pizza from a guy on Craigslist.
You were throwing cups at people in the basement, yelling at them to get out of your swamp.
I'm by the tree and the Dora the explorer balloon .. Look for the Dora the explorer balloon
Currently rolling a blunt in the bathroom of Planned Parenthood
You stared at a Swedish dude for like 5 minutes then asked him "shouldn't you be yelling at dragons"