He looks like Jesus, if Jesus had let himself go.
you figure out which one you wanna sleep with, & I'll sleep with the other one. problem solved
Nothing like all your friends getting engaged to remind you how much fun sleeping around is.
she made me take her to the grocery store to buy a gallon of sweet tea and a shit ton of band aids, the cashier asked if someone was hurt and she replied "not yet.."
She definitely pulled a diaper out of her purse and cleaned up the vodka with it, where do you meet these people?!
i could have sworn she did an overextended split with her legs over her head but now i think it was just the drugs
she just made some guy spank her... then made some chick take a running start and spank her.
She was purple for Halloween. She literally spray-painted herself purple and called it a costume. It won't come off.
There is this threesome scene that is literally 10 minutes of straight fucking
Omg so it's educational?
So how exactly do I backtrack from motorboating and ass grabbing?
...and as she's going down on me I look at the speedo and I'm doing 15 under, with 6 cars tailgating me, and I know her parents saw her head pop up because they were the car right behind us.
Im going to hell I gave him a handjob on the plane next, to an old guy playing video games on his iPad, on good friday.
I have bruises all over my legs. Did I hit a car with my bike last night?
I have dined. Now I want to get fucked.
Turns out naked twister is less fun than it sounds. I can never look Lee in the eye again. But Aimee's boobs are glorious.
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