I just saw a girl play flip cup with only her tongue
I'm in love
she must wash her vagina with a dirtier vagina
not sure what i find more disconcerting, your text or the fact that i recognized that as a dane cook quote
We Started drinking at 8am and left the bar around 11pm....I hate ALL green things
I'll tell you what, we couldn't have asked for better binge-drinking weather.
I just saw her punch a kid in the face.. i always knew she was the girl for me.
Don't remember much from last night, but I recall slipping you the tounge. For that I apologize
you just kept bragging about how there was a "pretty large" chance that you had pooped on the same toilet as George Clooney
I want an alcoholic time machine so we could skip to new years eve
you think that next time i come over to do this you can pick up the condom wrappers you used on the other girls
Just got motor boated by a horse in the street
He picked up a chick with a line about the price of used cars in Sri Lanka and developing economies. Step it up.
Know what the best part of waking up for work after a drinking vacation is? It's an easy question. Nothing. Nothing is the best part of that.
I "liked" his changed relationship status just to show him I'm ok with the fact he found someone not as pretty as me
the police dropped me off. that's how my night went.
Her tits are so fantastic they gave him a panic attack.
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