THAT'LL be a good time.
and i don't know why my phone always capitalizes that word.
My entire life is one complicated drinking game
not sure what to think.... picked her up and her dad says "if you take her home, you'll regret it"
Dude. 21 days till I'm 21. It's the 21 day countdown. The 25 days of Christmas can suck my dick.
we can't get the sharpie off the toilet seat from where you pressed your forearm with THUG LIFE written on it while you puked until 3 last night
The guy who was The Count on Sesame Street died this week too. Therefore, you should take multiple shots, count them, & go "ahh aaahh aaaahhh" after each one. I expect video...
Nothing says "Good Morning" like Jell-o shots and coffee cakes.
I'd say tonight was pretty successful. I rode an iron horse naked and sweet talked myself out of an MIC while wearing a bra filled with four loko.
Yeah to go race car driving with a 54 yr old gastroenterologist. I really wish you'd come to have that drink with me Wednesday
Someone broke in while we were at the bars, window is shattered but nothing got taken
Noone broke in, matt tried to pull a tyrese and punch through the window... were at the hospital.
Had a dream I cut my own dick off. That's it I gotta see a doctor...
Umm
Exactly.
did i just see you in the movie theater carrying a margarita into Frozen?
All the 6 year olds are jealous of my alcohol
right now I am washing the alcohol and shame off from last night
I'm pretty sure the cop knew you were drunk when you tried to light your cigg with a chapstick.
When the nurses wouldn't let him smoke in the hospital he decided to just roll around on the floor.
Randomize
