she just sneezed while going down on me. is it rude for me to ask her to do it again?
so for future reference,at what point did you feel like a line had been crossed?
i dont care about people's attitudes as long as they give me head
I did not just catch my dad watching porn.I did not just catch my dad watching porn. I did not just catch my dad watching porn.I did not just catch my dad watching porn. I did not just catch my dad watching porn. I did not just catch my dad watching porn. I did not just catch my dad watching porn.
He passed out while I was riding him, and just when I was about to call it quits he opens his eyes and squeezes my boobs and goes Honk! Honk!
just remind me when i get fired soon that august is the month i started pregaming work
i woke up wearing her shoes. this night isn't going on my highlight reel
No, you always delete them without reading. Enjoy the virtue of morning innocence. What are you doing today.
She looked at me and said "i like penises." and then passed out with her condom balloon animal in her hands.
Just drug him and when he wakes up be like "you just woke up from a coma, we've been married for the past five years." It'll be like the Vow but fucked up.
If we laid all the dicks that's have been inside of us end to end it would be as tall as 4 story building. 40 feet of dicks.
Well I can't message him and be like "hey I was behind you in CVS a month ago and I remembered your last name and DOB and looked you up on fb and added you so wanna hang out"
GOT MY PERIOD AND AN INTERNSHIP OFFER THIS IS A WONDERFUL DAY
I basically gave Miranda rights to the guy I hooked up with, jus so we were all clear what was happening
This fucking storm better not ruin my sex plans this weekend
Randomize
