Redeem this text for a blowjob
he doesn't care that i have a boyfriend so why should i?
logic in its finest
she's sitting alone using her breathalyzer as a kazoo. help.
My glasses smell like tequila. I just put them on and almost threw up.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He asked me where I wanted it. I told him in the condom. He stops mid thrust and says "you're no fun" and then blew. Chivalry is semi dead.
I am going to make your legs soar from cumming so much
Like they're going to fly away?
Night just started and I've already seen a woman headbutt a brick wall. Unintentionally. Epic to say the least
I woke up with the Dorothy costume at my ankles, both sparkly red shoes on, and clutching ToTo....we're not in Kansas anymore, dude
Honestly, it's his loss. He went for the free sample when he could've gotten the whole package, babes.
does that make me the free sample at the grocery store he didn't like enough to buy...? yeah, that advice didn't help, but thanks.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He balanced a treat on his nose, and then he rolled me a joint. My bf is the best pet ever.
I spilt beer on the table, and she quickly got a straw and yelled party foul and made me drink it.
I was going to do a cardio thing but then tacos.
So I just went to clothing optional bar
How the fuck did he think me asking about the possibility of a threesome was a rhetorical question?
you said you were going to the bathroom. we found you an hour later laying in the backyard clutching a bottle of vodka while singing the beatles and crying
Randomize