He wrote my name on his dick, took a picture and then said "this has your name written all over it!"
The worse part is i sent a text at like three that said i was getting head... Now i have no idea who's mouth has been on my dick
The more I look at him the more I wonder why anyone would ever want any of his features to be a part of their childs face.
he came over wasted, used the bathroom, drank some water, and fell asleep holding my hand. what kind of a fuck buddy does that??
Its official. I've reentered slutty territory. I was a condom away from having sex in a childs playhouse at a park. Oh and I lost my car keys.
Thanks for gettin' me home, killa. Have no IDEA how I woke up pants-less on the bathroom floor at 4a.m. You're like a big, angry guardian angel.
I just held a marble with my kegel muscles for 5 min. You may call me COCKCLAMP 9000!!!!
in the future when you find clothing in your street, just assume it's mine.
I just threw up again because I opened my eyes... God is laughing. I resorted to taking the Mexican Dramamine because I feel seasick from walking. Not helping.
Today's weekday brunch started at 2pm, and consisted of $7 of sandwich and $50 of cocktails. Also, I hustled the bartender for about $3 playing nickel poker, but he may have been letting me win. Either way, he didn't get into my pants.
I definitely don't have enough experience with hookers to be in this group text anymore.
I never truly understood the phrase ball is life until I started having to balance NBA finals and all these men with balls i'd like to handle.
Did i fall last night when u carried me home.
idk
OHHH yea you fell down the stairs face first
I came home in someone else's underwear this morning
Atleast you got a souvenir
so horny i almost want to text him..and then i remember the restraining order i have against him
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