Stoned at DSW. SO MANY SHOES! THEY'RE FREAKING ME OUT.
It's pretty bad when the convenient store clerk can tell you that you're earlier than usual for visiting the store.
this morning i woke up with my panties on and i knew where i was. success.
i gave her road head last night, needless to say it wasn't the same and i bit a chunk of the inside of my cheek off.
Being back home for the summer opens up so many opportunities to have sex without increasing my number
Her friend drew me a diagram of how we could get away with her giving me a blowjob at work.
Almost just got kicked out of a bar because the locals spilled beer everywhere when we taught them to shotgun.
The bar owner gave me permission to push people into the pool. I'm never going to leave Los Angeles
Want to get drunk and look at an xray of my dick?
How do you explain to a guy that he's like a little puppy dog that you play with, but then leave at the shelter to go home to your German Shepard?
I feel like every man should aspire to get a blowjob from a sword swallower.
I tried to settle their lesbian roommate fight by turning on Pretty Wild
I felt like I was having sex with Joffrey from Game of Thrones. Needless to say how bad it was
I want to respect them as people, but really I just want to have sex with them.
Ive completely stopped wearing makeup. Not even eyebrows. Thats how sick of wisconsin I am.
Randomize
