Just once id like a girl to say to me in the dracula voice, i want...to suck...your dick...
This bar is like a mediocre whore house....but free
lets have sex before this no shave november shit gets outta hand.
I want to make a porn site called "girls with daddy issues"
I mean, I'm all about sharing, but when he tells me about his wet dreams about Oprah, I think it's taking it too far.
So I totally just remembered that you tried to smoke a hornet out of it's nest.
You were in subway at 3am showing everyone your tan lines
how did we start talking about space blow jobs?
Is "you left your socks here, please come get them" a good way of saying "come fuck me?"
Exactly. So you're exempt under the "I can't just fuck her to make it go away" clause of 2010.
He was on top and as he finished he yelled "I love gold" , so yeah I'm seeing him later tonight
Don't be the guy that has his dick out at work.
I threw your vagina at him like a grenade. And sweet Jesus he caught it like a champ
My husband just came over to kiss me and said, "careful, I got a block of cream cheese in my pocket"
Just found a rebirth in peppermint schnapps. May be able to stay up all night and finish this paper after all. MERRY CHRISTMAS
Randomize
