Is it bad to mix sunny d with vodka if i dont have any real OJ?
I've mixd ketchup with vodka before and called it a bloody mary, so, no.
I love my bros weed
Im gonna hate it in like 20 mins though
So she is eating her margarita with tortilla chips....like using her chip as a spoon
sometimes i wish i could find another girl that loves my dick as much as she does
i feel like she has dreams of it being like a person saying hey lets go play
Sooo sorry about that. And crying. And comparing my life to a duck
imagine if we didn have a dick. we would be so much more productive
I resisted the temptation to hold the cake in one hand to alternate bites with the ruffles I was eating. I decided that might make me look dysfunctional.
Seriously, I'm making a calendar and marking off the days with little penis's
I'm ashamed and embarrassed. Unless we get drunk and have random sex with people we will never see again we might lose ourselves.
Do you still speak french? one of two girls I woke up with only speaks french...
The best part about daylight savings time this weekend is we get an extra hour to be fucked up.
Hey also tomorrow casually bring up wearing crocs to your sister's wedding
I think this Canadian beach volleyball player might be my soulmate. We could check each other's shoulders for melanoma.
I should probably add her on Facebook for as much as I cheat off her in Physics, huh?
Why the fuck is there raw bacon in my bra. I don't even have a stove.
Randomize
