you didnt say anything until i brought it up today. i guess i misjudged your maturity.
I guess I misjudged your gender.
so how does one go about finding a summer fling?
take advantage of an intern
Whats the glycemic index on semen?
the blizzard started in kansas. im debating driving to a bar now so i can get snowed in there for the game
I got to the apartment, I was handed a beer within 20 seconds, I'm glowing in the dark, there's fog everywhere, and now I'm wearing a sombrero because apparently it's silly hat night. I never want to leave.
Europeans suck. I just gave him head and somehow i am the one paying for the coffee
Hey, 'thunder cock' as proud as I am for you getting laid, could you put a muzzle on her? I have to be up at 5, thanks.
I went to the haunted house just to see her - Hello new fetish!
I'm high and reading a Wikipedia article on circumcision procedure. Help.
We were high as balls fucking in the back seat when we saw the blue lights. He's like, "I got this" and walked over butt ass naked and goes, "Sorry dude, we're just banging" and the cop apologized for disturbing us and drove off.
some kid lit a j in the bar tonight. i was in awe of both his boldness and the severe beatdown he received moments later
I gave him head during Pitch Perfect 2, I felt like the Bella's were cheering me on with their back up tunes
I am in serious pain and you're making dick jokes. I hope you wind up with crotch rot.
I'm just now realizing I've slept with guys from three different decades over the past year. That's gotta be some sort of record.
I have easymac and six pack of beer. This night can't get any better.
Randomize
