my boyfriend just named your boyfriend's penis.
I don't know whether I should be pissed that there's glitter in my bed or proud that there's semen in there too.
last night i found out that my 11 year old cousin used me as an example of what not to do in her D.A.R.E. speech. awesome.
tolerance is too high. going on a liquor strike. ghandi style.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
CAUTION: TWINS DO NOT HAVE TWIN PENISES.
Theres a truck parked on the front yard and i just want to take this opportunity to tell you now that it is not my fault.
Goats are brash and offensive and cocky animals
Are you high and at a petting zoo again?
Her mom offered to give me a lap dance. I was a guest, I couldn't say no.
We just had an accidental Facebook titty pic scare.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Broken leg sex is fun because I just get to lay there
I'm like, not good at living.
I was masturbating and a roofer walked past my bedroom window.
We are best friends because we can vomit simultaneously in the same toilet and not care
So if he doesn't show up do we eat his birthday cake? Because I'm stoned and wrestling is on. What's the proper protocol
What the hell do you do when your fuck buddy leaves to go for a piss naked and 20 minutes later hasn't come back and can't be found anywhere in the house or outside but has left his phone, tee shirt and shoes in your bedroom.
I don't think there is a pre defined social etiquette for a lost naked fuck buddy now roaming the streets.
Randomize