We were driving to the party as he was giving me key bumps.. That's what I call team work
You kicked in the door when she was blowing him. You dont remember do you?
At least my fat-chick-ratio has not been that bad this semester ...
Come, dress lightly, bring tequila...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I have been sober for so long that I miss hangovers... what is happening to this summer?
Care to explain why there is sushi in the soap dish in the bathroom
Me and Phil are just drawing pictures of thumbs in different costumes during lecture. I love being a senior.
It must have been an amazing night, I have "my pants are responsible people" written on my pants in permanent marker.
I tried to stop that, but then I pulled the leaves out of my panties and went to sleep.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
So our trip to Disney World ended in the three of us stripping at a gay club in orlando.
My flask has coffee in it for finals week.. So that's responsible right?
I love that we can live in a world where I can Google "Harry Potter lizard" and an illustration for my dream pops up
I FLASHED A GUY AT MCDONALDS FOR A FREE BREAKFAST BURRITO. IT WORKED!
I smell like cotton candy and guilt.
He said my vagina smelled like pomegranates. Its like my vagina is the fountain of youth.
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