dude i woke up to her making a statue of my morning wood for her sculpture class. HOW THE FUCK do you think i feel about her?
Still bad at ganbling. Still good at dringing.
I just had a flashback of me saying "I'm not ready to be a deadbeat mom" lastnight.
the ball fondling will be left out of the trip recanting
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
It's a long way off yet but I've started planning my eviction party. Be prepared, it includes jungle juice.
We didn't even make it to the door before they came out saying we weren't allowed in because of last time..
UPDATE: WE WILL BE HITTING THE BATMAN PINATA WITH A SWORD
i think i swapped my keys for drugs last night
You emptied out your taco and asked the lady for a refill...and then you continued to carry out a full conversation SCREAMING
Apparently it is impossible to get kicked out of taco bell....I'll try harder next time
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I punched some guy in the face for being an asshole then later I went to say sorry and give him a hug and he started making out with me. How was your new years?
I'm playing drinking games with a boy who looks like Liam Hemsworth. I think I'm fine.
you bleached my bangs. i have an interview later today and you assholes bleached my bangs.
He was simultaneously rubbing my shoulders and fucking me. I'm keeping him.
I don't care how hot she was. She didn't like Scooby Doo and I don't fuck with that.
I just went to cvs and bought condoms, handcuffs and a coloring book
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