think what you will about my sexuality, just get the cigarettes
just caught my little brother jacking off the family pet
stop calling my apartment porn island.
So I got a little fucked up on the punch, and made out with the family friend. Which is apparently morally reprehensible. I don't get that.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i was taking the test and had to adjust my boner and my teacher thought i was cheating or something
After she came with my hands around her neck, she sat there for a minute and gave me the scuba diving sign for a-ok.
You can buy vodka at target here.. Maybe Missouri isn't so bad after all
I'm going to a foam party and gonna grind someones dick off hayy
I have no idea why I said that. I have no idea why anything happened last night, I broke my toaster making a egg. I'm going to quit drinking.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Want to know what makes for a better story than treehouse sex? Getting busted during treehouse sex
You thought you were drunk? I woke up at 6 o'clock this morning with a cheeseburger in my left hand a drink in my right with my window half way down. it was raining.... fml
Just realized i left my bra at his house. WHY do i suck at one night stands?!
Meanwhile I'm googling glory holes in Vegas
I have an aggressive hickey on my shoulder and it actually hurts.
I was on top for a full on make out when in dead silence "I'm moaning Myrtle" came from the TV. Moment ruined. I got cock blocked by a fictional ghost
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