Tell her to GTFO!!!!! JAI HO!!!!!
he pissed his pants, and she still wants to hook me up with him. I try not to date guys with bladder control problems... Unless they're loaded anyway.
I just filled out my 2010 Census drunkenly. I'm single handedly throwing it off.
Is it cum slut, cumslut or cum-slut? Sexting, plz advise ASAP
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
There's a very real possibility that I'll wake up in your uncle's driveway.
She wasnt impressed wen i brought a guy for her back with me, a 3am impromptu sperm donor is not a gd birthday present. Im a bad gf.
I am not going to ask my mother to pause a movie so I can have phone sex.
I'm concerned I'll look like a hooker on new years eve in this outfit
There are different standards on new years eve. To look like a hooker you literally need to be giving a guy head on the street while he's handing you cash.
"Bring the kids" is the most terrifying 3 words I've ever heard in my life.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm honestly considering asking her if I can eat her out, as a friend.
Hahahaha don't tempt me. Remember we're trying to avoid airport jail if possible
Fuck that, come home. Let's get drunk and judge people.
Can't talk, ducks in the car
I'm still here... I feel so bad wearing your mom's cardigan at a strip club 🙈
What color nail polish screams, "Either fuck me or get the hell out of my way"?
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