What happened to our ballroom dancing plans
what kind of morning-after breakfast implies 'thanks for the sex, but i'm not gonna call you ever again'?
And. No one ejaculated on anyones face. This is all wrong
I'm sorry you missed class, the topic today is copy and paste. I'm not even kidding.
Apparently it costs $70 to clean vomit off the side of our apartment building.
I've been living off of popsicles and broth.
I was asking the bouncer, "if I fall will you catch me?" which then turned into "if I jump off the roof will you catch me?" He said no.
He must have found my secret supply of blow and took a bump before we left the house. Rude.
He could of at least asked
I just need some of your time and all of your body.
You challenged a dog groomer that she couldn't cut human hair ... How's the shaved head
Bring shot glasses to the final. Don't ask questions.
But I’m still curious to know... how did the homemade porno go?
Where do you think your fantastically immense lady-boner for men in uniform comes from?
Hhhaaa He said Peanutburter disinfect lol. Like peanut butter can disinfect stuff. None of those guys are safe
She grabbed a $20 bill out of my hand, calling it a lap dance coupon and then she dragged me into her bedroom. I think I’m in love
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