And i was thinking, 'i'm happy to be underneath you, but i wish you weren't doing THAT.'
it only took me 1 hour to write 8 pages. i'm never doing school work without adderall ever again.
chinese tourists just took a picture of me....im pretty sure i heard the bus drive say something about shame.
Everything gets a little fuzzy after the flats of jello shots, but I do have a vague recollection of being at the top of a large human pyramid
the story is to long to tell you via txt so when you notice the tattoo on your ass call me.
If you wake up soonish don't worry. I took your dog to burger king and now we're going to see some nice girls.
we have what I like to call an assload of ramen noodles
So we were having sex and his roommate walks in eating a bag of chips. Then proceeds to talk to us about his bitch of a professor.
Did he at least offer you guys chips?
We're all just looking at each other quietly, hoping that no one brings up last nights shenanigans.
There's a guy here who is improvising his own shadow dance on a table against the wall, in case you're wondering how my night is going
You are the tramp this city needs, but not the one it deserves.
I mean it's a good blow job, but it's not worth the four hour round trip.
FUCK the WHO, FUCK cancer, I'm gonna eat fucking bacon.
he tried to have the "are we in a relationship" chat last night. I stuck my fingers in my ears, yelled lalalalalala very loudly at him and told him I would stop having sex with him if he ever tried that conversation again. bad person, or just being a realist?
She could hold her breath for a long time. Best underwater blowjob ever.
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