I just googled dawgpound, shoulda seen that pornsite coming
My sink just fell out of the wall. I can't deal with this right now
It finally happened. My conscience stopped working. I've never felt so free
Apparently I spent my 300 dollar tax return by ordering ramen on amazon last night. Please tell me this will somehow pay off in the long run.
At this point I just want to meet a man with a job.
I was in my bathroom taking a shit and my mom just opened the door, walked in, handed me a fudgesicle, and left without saying a word. Yeah. That just happened.
THIS IS THE EMERGENCY BOOZE SYSTEM. I AM EN ROUTE TO DEWITT WITH A FIFTH OF TEQUILA. THIS IS NOT A TEST
i mean let's face it...the pregnant girl was really slowing us down.
I have their Unicorn picture in my shirt, and I just threw a Bud Light Platinum bottle through their window. We need to go now.
The number of times I've puked in the Walgreens bathroom is becoming way too many for my pride.
The last thing I remember was paying off her younger brother not to judge me, then puking on his shoes.
I wish there was an emoji to express our Eskimo Brothership
Can I get high for this class every tuesday? Its like a multi-sensory carnival acid trip.
What does it mean when the government shuts down and your boyfriends wife wants a divorce ON YOUR BIRTHDAY?
It's beautiful. It's what jesusxwants. I should send you a pic of my boobs out of friendship
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