the bus pole looks like a man who feels guiltyty about something
If it was for sex do you really think i would asking for a mass vote? I'm like fidel castro when it comes to sex. No public approval needed.
sitting in an airport in detroit. just saw a commercial for detroit tourism with kid rock as a spokesman. reason # 1458 to never visit this city.
strippers are much less mysterious after you sleep with them
The question is do I invite my fuck buddy to my graduation party now that my girfriend found out about her?
Next person that gets my dog drunk is paying to have my carpet cleaned. I am tired of getting up to pee and stepping in dog barf.
She said, "awww, you're so sweet" after I started putting on a condom. How many STDs have I just contracted?
All you need to do now is invest in a Speedo and start going door to door.
Should have know they were on something when he started filling a Togo container with fruit
I agree with that homeless guy though, you do need a haircut
This is why I only drink in places with a C or D health rating
Correction: *I* watched JoJo's Bizarre adventure while he snored asleep on me cock still fully inside me.
The highlight of my night will be digging in other people's garbage
Please tell me im imagining that i claimed that i was king of the ducks.
I went to steal condoms from your room and all I could find was chik fil a sauce
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