What tipped you off? The sombrero?
her body is proportioned like a family guy character
thanks for paying me in special brownies...but brownies dont pay the rent...anymore.
i'm taking a spore imprint of the mushroom we found growing in our bathroom and sending a picture to ryan. he will then be able to tell if it's trip-worthy
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You're worse than that girl who made out with her cousin at that party
That was you...
when my phone is in portrait view you can just assume i've been watching porn. that's the only thing i want to see in full view.
Did you know they have a bouncer at Applebee's because I did not
last night you told me I had a dark, salty butthole
Just got a 15 minute lecture from a drag queen about how bisexuality doesn't exist. Cher would be so disappointed in her.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
STOP PUTTING PICTURES OF JONAH HILL IN MY KITCHEN CABINETS!
If you recall, I made a Zoolander reference almost immediately after you pulled out of me the first time we had sex.
Why is it that the asexual in our group is the one that gets laid the most often??
I think I swiped left on my soulmate
Remember when I puked into a mesh garbage can in the middle of a meeting and told the clients it was "morning sickness"?
hahah yep
Well the are flying back here, it's been like 10 months, should I frame fake baby pics in my office?? Or too much?
Breakfast sounds amazing but can we do IHOP instead? I have to pick up a Plan B pill and there’s a CVS next to it
Randomize