I'm in your bed right now
Okay meet you there give me 10
Don't think you can make me leave either
Give me ten I ha e to be ******'s wingman I want you
I'm drunk at a fancy martini bar, wearing jeans, drinking cheap vodka that I brought in my purse. Got thrown out of court for using my cell phone. All in all calling Thursday a success.
i just saw a white kid with an afro using a martini shaker as a coffee thermos. go college.
I started drinking at 10.30am. Ive got a solid buzz, ive decided holidays are to be treated like gamedays
you only had a canadian ten, but you said it was all good cuz you would just by molson.
Did you know they have alcohol AND weed delivery in Canada??? I'm not EVER coming home
all of his pictures were taken on a library computer, how did you even consider fucking him?
how many past hook-ups can i invite to go bar hopping with me for my b-day before it becomes a bad idea?
your drunk ass trust falled a guy double fisting bud limes and as a result your head bounced off the patio table. So that might explain the stitches on the back of your head.
my roommate just showed me the scar on her forehead... that she got from a shake weight... That. just. happened.
You just stood up, raised your glass and said, "I'd like to thank the academy" then fell through a glass table. THAT'S why we cut you off.
In hindsight combining orgy Thursday with mystery drink madness was begging for failure
The alcohol tastes like we did a beer run at the nail salon
She gave me a job then fed me cheesecake in bed. She's a keeper!
Good Morning! You are sterile right?
Randomize