So my shaver died while I was trimming...ya know. And now it is half way done. I don't think there's currently any aesthetic in keeping it this way...
Are you kidding me. My sex life has diminshed to having wet dreams about jerking off.
Last night I saw a drag queen take a shot of Red Hot that was soaked into a tampon. I fucking love my life!
A girl limped into my class 15 minutes late wearing sunglasses, leggings, and a kiss me im irish shirt. She sat down and took her glasses off and im pretty sure she only had one eye's makeup still on. Someone had a great st pattys day.
Before we started fucking, he laid me on the bed, and asked my what my sleep number was, so that i would be "comfy"
I think I get why guys like boobs so much. I just motorboated myself and it's fun. My boobs feel soft and squishy on my face.
You're the only person I know who would say "we'll play it by ear" referring to a threesome
I can't believe you picked a finger in the ass over lunch with me.
I'm just gonna use that pot butter as dip for chips. That's fat, American AND stoner!
It's not that I even wanna fuck these guys anymore, just cuddle that's all. My conscience has never been so proud.
He may not be fully over his current wife yet. But wait until I show him my tits in his office at the end of the day tonight.
I also slapped not one but two bananas on the ass, twerked in public, and I think I made out with someone
You slid down a wall, tried to pull your cast off and yelled that casts were too conformist.
I just found a nug casually in my room under my duffel bag. Is this a sign I need help?
I'm getting drunk off Malibu and watching Drag Race and it's only 2 in the afternoon. I'm the poster child for sad gay men.
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