why is jon gosselin on the news 24/7 for dating some new lady?? how bout I get on msnbc for not getting laid since forever ago
No one goes out in public like that, unless they do anal
she wrote "SORRY" in her vomit and left
Currently bleeding through my leggings. Not good. Not good at all.
Hospital.
I am invincible.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Apparently I took one a huge picture off the wall at the bar and was walking around dancing with it..
Totally sleeping on a bloodstained mattress tonight. I love life's little adventures.
The thumbs up barstamp on my hand is mocking my hangover with its positivity.
He said he wanted to go to France " just to piss in the nice areas". I want to fuck him.
Also, if you all get arrested i'm coming to laugh at you because i don't have the money for bail.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
This chick had a condom box organized by size with dividers that glowed in the dark.
I made him watch the first 5 episodes of Game of Thrones before I decided to sleep with him.
Road head absolutely translates. That's the beauty of road head... It's so portable!
My roommate walked in on my inserting a tampon. Somehow, I don't think this will be improving our relationship.
There better be alcohol at this child's birthday party. Seriously not trying to be entertained by a clown while I'm still sober.
You showed up at 4 am holding a beer and wearing a wig you apparently found in the dumpster.
That explains some things...
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