Pat told us he showed us his penis because he's "a nice guy".
i think i am going to devote my summer to making my cats internet celebrities
we bribed her with croutons and jello shots.
By the way, i got bored and just started putting my balls on every object in your room. One at a time.
Fucking someone because they own a lava lamp is like fucking someone because they have 20 dollars and no concern for their house burning down.
Her shirt said pass joints, not judgement. You're surprised she stole your wallet after?
I am debating about my sub. I am not quite sure I can be the dom he needs.
My gut feeling that we had reached a new level of intimacy last night was confirmed early this morning when you sleep farted on penis.
Hot dogs and hydrocodine is NOT the combo of champions
You also hate cartoons and musicals, so I will take that to mean the movie was as awesome as I thought it was..smoke weed
You set fire to his cat.
In my defense, I did not think it would be in the trash bag.
I am witnessing a blind guy whip ass at beer pong
remember that party we went to sophomore year where we found that girl and had the orgy? Im totally at that house right now.
Just shaved my balls on a moving train. By far the most dangerous stunt I've ever pulled
Why are there naked heterosexuals in my apartment?
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