i'm saving my butt for my wedding night
no really all good couples have similar hair colors!
He proposed that we "bone". I've completely given up on boys.
im guessing your the one that tried to make bacon in the toaster
21 People Confess What It’s Really Like At An Orgy
okay, I promise to stop paying strippers to hit you
it was either that or behind a dumpster, and i am way too pretty to pee behind a dumpster
I'm so prepared to puke on walk of shame tomorrow that I'm putting a toothbrush and toothpaste in my purse the night before. And to think, my dad thought I wouldn't make it in college.
I want to die. Marc and I were making out in the hallway and fell into a fire hose in a glass case. It shattered everywhere. Everyone thought we fell out a window. I think I have glass in my back. Awesome.
You always have that cute deer in the headlights look. Thats what made showing you my penis for the first time so disconcerting.
These 15 Honest Illustrations Show What Women Do When No One Is Watching
pretend your vagina is a choco taco and the guy is someone who really loves choco tacos. let him enjoy the choco taco.
You and the dog were competed for the water dish
Not only did my parents pick me up from his hotel room in the morning, but he also came outside and had a casual little chat with my dad through the driver's side windrow.
I am thankful for thumbs.
Because without thumbs, we would be dolphins.
I need to be put in a corner surrounded by pamphlets of stds and babies
Do you know how awkward it is to get a dick pic while working at babies r us?