She'll never know what hit her
I dunno. Girls tend to recognize ball-to-chin contact.
its 4th on my favorites list. 1. butt sex 2. mini skirts 3. three meat pizza rolls 4. fuck the pain away by peaches
Im like a co-bf. he pays for her birthday and christmas, but i get all the action.
I have 11 glasses of water and one beer on the table infront of me. Have to keep going to different bartends to get more. There are only two though and I think they've caught on
get to allyx's house asap
Ok is everything ok
Yeah, theres just lesbians
omg yes on my way
Its funny how you denied every part of the text except " you hate fat ppl"
He's cute when he's drunk, too. Also he tried to fight my door...
Well it was tamer than the 4th of july when I blew that guy I met walking home from the fireworks
He put his hand in my cleavage. NOT ON. IN. BETWEEN. NO more gingers
Just when I thought I was growing up, I go out and TOTALLY REDEEM MYSELF
Listen. You dont know how advanced you are in yoga till you have to shave your butthole
Well, i'm not hugging a bag of cheetos and crying while I watch Friends wishing that we were Ross and Rachel. So clearly I'might doing better than last night.
I just destroyed that poor boy. Picked him up and put him wherever I wanted, it was like the Pride version of Elf on a Shelf.
Guy just rode past on a lowrider bike smoking a blunt, I want his life
I can't take 'get a man' advice from you. You'll stick your penis in a warm banana peel.
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