just do it
fine only cuz shes asian
I am dying of drunk and no thats not a typo.
i just set an alarm for noon. fuck yes winter break.
just woke up with a thong on my face, dont remember going home with anyone and its way too big for it to be a good thing
Would you like to blur the lines between friendship and lesbianism tonight?
Dude, didn't you know? Its balls out wednesday.
Where the hell is he. I called him crying for weed and sex you would think that would signal some urgency.
We are magical, pot smoking, smart as hell, single as fuck, woodland dolphins.
most desperate stoner moment might have been when we filled the bong up with pond water
desperate times, desperate measures
Nhl reached an agreement. I plan on getting me some celebratory sex from a hockey player.
You know it was a weird week when you have a mystery bruise and youre unsure if it was from crazy sex or getting bit by a duck. Life.
This drink tastes like mosquito repellent.
I'm too pretty to go to jail. Especially in Louisiana.
I’d feel the same about religion. We can talk about it, but I want you to go down on me first
All I wanted to do was come home from work and masturbate for national sex day... I sliced my the tip of finger giving myself a pedicure so I can’t even do that #singlelife
Randomize
