Still at the library. i hate tax accounting so much that i've started calling it potions...
He saw my tits then looked up and yelled thank you jesus as loud as he could
All four of us managed to throw up in the same bathroom at different times during the night. I think we'll get along great living together.
I was cut off by 8, I need to rethink this breakup therapy strategy
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Nope she woke up in a hotel room alone on 55th street. A guy in a lamborgini gave her a ride this morning. She was walking barefoot home
Okay. But I hope it isn't expensive lingerie. Because I'm ripping it off Hulk Hogan style.
Just had ice cream and a blow job come together in one glorious, defining moment.
apparently my buddy was fucking on our couch downstairs so i decided it was necessary to walk downstairs naked in a hockey mask.
He ended up buying the equivalent of dinner at a Mexican place, in weed
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
That's fine. It's not illegal to bring ham into a museum.
I don't want to resort to having sex with people that actually like me.
I was so high I could TASTE the fillings in my teeth
i told someone my fallback plan was to be a slutty bartender and i needed the practice as i straddled them to pour a shot
Why is this not the first time I’ve seen the mugshot of someone I’ve slept with
that's the second time my extensive knowledge of taylor swift has gotten me laid
Randomize