i wonder what megan fox's vagina feels like.
Heaven soaked bacon.
we're talking about where were going. or where we stand. but yeah we'll basically be doing it in the hallway so just ignore us
apparently people get pissed when you take the bag of wine out of the franzia box and put it in your purse before leaving the party
just did the walk of shame by his grandma. what the fuck is an old lady doing up at six am?
should i be impressed or disgusted that i was spitting glow-in-the-dark?
I gave up my innocence when I let him cum in my spelling bee trophy
At some point I'd like to figure out how the weird kid from sociology ended up on my couch naked hugging what appears to be some sort of clothing....seriously it's creeping me out
God I miss you. I want to fuck your face... Then do all the girly cuddly shit too.
She brought over her portable harddrive and we dueled with porn. This relationship is too beautiful to last.
you look like you're about to get down on your knees and give america the business.
You don't know how much I love you. You could play Careless Whisper while we have sex and I'd still love you
If we try hard enough and believe in ourselves, we can still make it to Wendy's before they close
a homeless man let us know that my friend was asleep in the bushes outside my house on main street. So just a small get together.
Leave it to you to bring a trash can into a fist fight.
Soon to be ex is nowhere to be found. Her attorney/new BF just showed up. 30 minutes late looking hungover. Pretty sure I'm getting the kids AND the house!
Randomize